By the summer of 1991, I was an avid comic book reader and had a decent collection of my own. It didn’t matter if it was a Marvel or a DC book, I was into both, and I got my hands on as many comics as I possible could.
Almost on a daily basis I would walk across the street from my apartment to a convenience store called Avitables, or something like that. I always headed there first because not only did they have a comic rack, but they also had 2 hot dogs for 99 cents, so it was win win for me.
Anyways, sometime during 1991, Marvel tested a new feature in its “Bullpen” page: The Collometer, a sarcastic guide to what I guess the Marvel editors deemed cool and uncool during that particular month. I’d basically forgotten about the feature, but this past weekend I picked up a stack of early 90’s comics, and as I began to browse them at home, I ran across the famed Marvel Coolometer.
In retrospect, these monthly Coolometers are nothing more than bad jokes with a some self-promotion thrown in for good measure. They even took a dig at the competition once in a while if I remember correctly.
But back then as a kid, I took them seriously because I felt like they validated my own likes or dislikes. And on occasion, they’d make me question why I liked something they deemed “uncool.”
Like I said, these Coolometers seem silly now that I’m older and wiser. I don’t even remember some of the stuff they reference. But this particular Coolometer shown below stood out for me for a couple of reasons:
- So if I’m reading this right, harrasing people is okay as long as its not sexual harrasment?
- I have no idea why Ann-Margaret was cool that January, but I’m guessing Redd Foxx had just dies which is why he’s on the list.
- And what is “Parodies of Same” even mean?
Yeah, these are rather silly 25 years later. But at least they were a step up from those sea monkey ads that were all over comics in the late 1970’s and early 1980’s.