Every time we go to the movies, the wifey asks me if I want something from the concession stand. My answer is rarely yes, because I really don’t feel like paying over $4 for a small drink. And if I wanted something to eat, we’d be talking at least $15 total.
Now that I live in the South, that’s actually pretty cheap for food and drink. I can only imagine how much it costs for a small drink and a hot dog in my old stomping grounds of Boston. Probably the same as the movie ticket, if not more.
Anywho, concession stand prices were already high in 2002 when Laneit, his girlfriend, and I decided to go see “The Sum of All Fears.” You know, the Jack Ryan movie starring Ben Affleck and Morgan Freeman. The movie that’s not as bad as everyone thinks it is, that spy movie. Well, Laneit and I were rather hungry before the movie, so we decided to hit a grocery store before the movie. Why a grocery store?
Because we wanted to something we couldn’t get at the movie theatre. That afternoon we loaded up with chips and salsa, Doritos, drinks, and 3 types of cookies: Oreos, Chips Ahoy!, and something Laneit’s girlfriend chose. What can I say? we were looking for a variety.
Speaking of his girlfriend, she took the biggest purse she had to the movie, and that’s how we got all our food in. Nobody from the theatre ever said anything to us, but we sat all the way in the back so nobody would notice us.
If you’ve seen “The Sum of All Fears,” then you might remember the scene where Morgan Freeman tells Affleck to invite his girlfriend to the White House state dinner. That’s when Laneit told his girlfriend to dig out the chips and salsa.
I don’t know if any of you have tried to dip and eat chips and salsa in the dark, but let me tell you: it’s not as easy as you think. The whole time we were eating, the couple in front of us kept hushing us, which of course just made Laneit chew louder.
Then came the cookies. That was another disaster, because Laneit’s girlfriend dropped them, and they went everywhere. We still had the other two packages, but after the chips and salsa, the cookies tasted off.
By the time Ben Affleck and Bridget Moynahan shared a picnic on the Washington Mall, our section was littered with crumbs and a girlfriend who was screaming at Laneit and me about how bad an idea this whole thing was. But we told her that by buying all this food, we saved big bucks, she didn’t care, and didn’t talk to us on the drive home.